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Mental Health Care for Dealing with Each Stage of Grief

Experts say that the grieving process is not linear. For a better understanding of how grief is handled and processed by people, the Kübler-Ross model is taken into consideration by the therapists. Formulated by Swiss-American psychiatrist Elizabeth Kübler-Ross in 1969, the model states that people go through five stages. These stages are:

• Denial
• Anger
• Bargaining
• Depression
• Acceptance

In most cases, these stages are common, but they don’t always progress in such a linear fashion. A person facing the loss of a loved one may be in any of these stages for a period of time that is not fixed in any manner. They can feel the anger and start to bargain fast and may remain in the depression stage for longer durations. Thus, a one-size-fits-for-all approach doesn’t work in therapy. Each person needs guidance that is suited to their condition specifically.

According to therapists, depression is the stage when most people either seek counseling or are persuaded by their loved ones to take treatment.

Signs & Symptoms of Grieving

For a few months after facing the loss, the symptoms of normal and complicated grieving look similar. In general, the signs of normal grief start to fade away over time, but when someone is in complicated grief, the symptoms linger for longer and may even get worse. Considering these aspects, the signs and symptoms of complicated grief, which need therapy and treatment to feel better, are as follows:

• Focus on only the death and not on anything else
• Intense pain, sorrow, and rumination over the loss of the loved one
• Problems in accepting the situation
• Extreme focus or avoidance of the reminders of the loved one
• Persistent and intense longing for the deceased
• Detachment or numbness
• General bitterness about the loss
• Lack of trust in others
• Feeling that life is meaningless
• Inability to live and enjoy life
• Facing issues in carrying out the normal day-to-day tasks
• Isolating oneself from others
• Wishing that you had also died with the person
• Experience depression, guilt, self-blame, and deep sadness

Major Causes

In general, major causes can include the environment, personality traits, our body’s natural chemical makeup, and our inherited traits. It is noticed by experts that females and older people are more prone to grieving. Factors that can increase the risk of developing complicated grief are as follows:

• Death of a child
• Sudden, unexpected, and violent death of a loved one
• Dependent or close relationship to the deceased person
• Loss of social support or friendships and social isolation
• Past history of anxiety, depression, or PTSD
• Traumatic childhood, such as facing neglect or abuse
• Other major life stressors

The 5 Stages

A person grieving the loss of a loved one goes through five stages, as discussed above. These stages are:

• Denial- The sudden loss makes the person go out of sync with reality. They are unable to accept that this has happened to them. Experiencing shock, people feel that life has no meaning for them. This stage also helps in surviving the initial shock.
• Anger- This is a crucial stage in the healing process. The person starts to feel anger; towards others, oneself, the deceased person, and even God.
• Bargaining- We try to bargain with the pain by creating false hopes through negotiations that we keep conjuring up in our minds. During this stage, we become desperate to get that life back, which we were living before the event, and for that, we are seen making deals in our mind in order to change the effect on the outcome.
• Depression- When we reach the stage of depression, we start to truly feel the loss and enter into a much quieter stage. In our depressive state, we mostly see ourselves cutting ties from the people around us, to the level that we prefer loneliness.
• Acceptance- After going through all the tough emotions, we start to accept the situation in terms that this is how the reality will be now. Acceptance here doesn’t mean that we are “OK” with what happened, rather, it is on the lines that we accept the reality as a permanent one.

How to Cope With The Loss of a Loved One

Facing this situation is never easy and the pain experienced by the person who loses a loved one can truly only be felt by them. It is important that we allow enough time to process the emotions. None of the stages can be rushed into and healing takes time. We should accept that this is a process and the awareness about the grieving process is crucial. Give yourself time to heal, talk to your loved ones, and if they are unable to understand the pain,you must seek therapy. A counselor can give you the right ways and means through which these feelings can be faced and tackled, rather than running away from them.

Find Care With a Therapist Who’s Right For You

We agree that not every therapist will be able to help you in the way you would want. Although one needs to go through a few sessions before making a decision, if you feel you are not getting the right guidance, you can choose other counselors who you might think can be the right fit for you.

Schedule a Virtual Appointment with a Counsellor Today

If you or anyone around you is grieving and would like help, you can contact us for further details. Our dedicated Counsellors are always there to help you out. Nobody in the world can ever replace the loss you are facing, but we can together help in your healing.