Puberty can be confusing and daunting. Sudden physical changes, accompanied by changing behavior, can perplex children and parents. While preparing your daughter for her first period can seem like a difficult task – it doesn’t have to be! An open, honest and positive conversation with her can completely change her outlook on her monthly experience for the next forty-odd years.

Most girls get their first period around 12-15 years, but each body is different. However, talking to your daughter before her first period is essential. Having these conversations early on can give your child a better head start. They will know what to expect in the future. You can choose to keep the information general initially. Later, when they get more curious, you can play your part in de-stigmatizing menstruation. Tell them that there is nothing to be ashamed of the blood, and bleeding does not make them unclean, despite what society may say or think.

The start of menstruation is a significant event in a girl’s life. Sufficient information and empowerment to deal with the new changes in her body can help your daughter navigate a new time in her life more easily. It is essential to have an open and honest conversation. This way, when the time comes, your child will know they have the support they need. Here is how you can make menstruation much less scary for your child.

What Do I Talk About?

These are some frequently asked questions by children about menstruation that can help guide you!

1). What are periods?

A period is that time of the month (generally) when hormonal changes occur in the body. Most girls begin menstruating when they are 12-15 years old. This is because these ages are marked by puberty and the bodily changes that come with it. So, when menstruation occurs, the ovaries release the female hormones progesterone and estrogen. The uterine (or womb) lining thickens due to these hormones. If there is no fertilized egg, this lining disintegrates and ruptures. This occurs in the form of a repeated monthly cycle. Because of this, most girls and women have menstruation once every month.

2). How come only girls have them?

Boys and girls have different types of bodies. So, the way they grow up is different. Boys go through other puberty changes, like deepening their voices and facial hair growth.

However, periods only happen because of the uterus shedding its internal lining. And since the uterus is present only in the female body, boys and men do not menstruate.

3). Do girls have them for the rest of their lives?

No, a woman stops having her period, usually between the ages of 45 and 51. Your first period is known as menarche, and your last period is known as menopause.

4). How long does it last, and how much blood is there?

The duration varies for each girl. Some have their period for three days, and others have it for a week. Periods can be light, moderate, or heavy, and there can be 2-4 tablespoons (30-59 milliliters) of blood. And this can vary every month.

5). Do girls always have cramps?

Period cramps are a pain in the stomach, uterus, back, and shoulder during menstruation. Most girls experience menstrual pain throughout their menstrual cycle; however, cramps usually last only a few days. But it is not necessary that everyone will experience them with the same intensity. In the case of some women and girls, cramps may not occur at all.

Yet, it is essential to let your daughter know not to ignore and disregard her period pain. Ensure she talks to a parent or trusted adult who can help relieve her pain with a hot water bottle or heat pad. If cramps become unbearable, it is advisable to consult a medical expert.

Tips for Talking

It can be uncomfortable to broach the topic at first. Just as parents might find it embarrassing to talk to their daughters about menstruation, children might also find it awkward.

This is observed especially in the case of fathers. So, if you are a single father, it is essential to educate yourself and then speak to your child.

Here are some tips to help you make the conversation more honest and open discussion:

1). Get the right information

Educating our children with correct and up-to-date information is necessary. Instead of shying away from menstruation aspects that might be uncomfortable to deal with, we should talk about all aspects. Speak to your family doctor and get verified information and ways to explain menstruation in kid-friendly ways.

Brush up on what you know about periods, and have reliable sources of information readily available for your child to refer to. Look for good books or videos to help you have a more educational discussion.

2). Make it a discussion, not a lecture

To break the ice, start the conversation by asking your child some questions. Ask whether she knows about periods, the ads she has seen on television, or if she has spoken to her friends and peers about it.

If you are a mother, please talk about your experiences with menstruation, and add how you have dealt with it. This empowers your daughter to approach periods with a healthier attitude, knowing that women all over go through it.

If you hear your child mention something regarding periods, start a conversation by asking where the information came from. It can be a great way of clearing misconceptions and myths about menstruation.

3). Discuss female hygiene products

Explore menstrual products together, and make sure your child knows it is her choice which product she wishes to use. Be hands-on about explaining how to use the product and describe each product’s pros and cons. Empower your daughter to deal with any situation. It is vital that you guide them on ways to manage their first cycle if they are away from home. It would be best if you also taught them effective ways of managing a leak.

To sum it up:

The best strategy to reduce a girl’s anxiety is to inform her so that she is ready and confident when the time arrives. A preteen may find her first menstrual cycle a little unpleasant, but with your guidance and support, she will be able to handle the changes with assurance. Your daughter will understand that there is no need to worry, as she will feel prepared and confident to manage the situation efficiently. However, this is possible only if you are ready to make that change.

Educating our daughters about menstruation is essential as they will go through it for several years. To have an open and honest discussion, we must be comfortable and answer all their questions – even if they may make us awkward. Arm yourself with up-to-date and verified information, and consult a medical expert to help you have the conversation if necessary. Consult India’s top gynecologists from the comfort of your home on DocVita.